Coney Island Dog
If you’re new to Unquotables, welcome aboard matey! This is a weekly feature that is filled with quotes that were definitely NOT said by anyone. In fact, Coney Island Dog made them up! It’s completely satire and we love that for us.
Without further ado, these are things that definitely WERE NOT said by the riders or personnel after the eighth round of the 2024 Monster Energy Supercross Championship, but we all know they were thinking it.
AMA: “We actually allow people behind the bikes as they start, but no one wants to get roosted.”
KTM Bosses: “We’re too busy wondering about what suspension to run, than whether a clear rulebook violation was made by a rival team on the start-gate.”
Random Daytona Fan #1: “Anyone wanna buy Jett Lawrence’s winning goggles? Unsigned.”
Random Daytona Fan #2: “How else will I be at the front line of the podium, if I don’t cross the track in front of Anderson?”
Random Daytona Fan #3: “I’ve been told that everyone loves air horns, so I figured I’d just keep blasting mine as much as I could.”
Jett Lawrence: “I took the shirt off myself, because I thought it would be better than a fan just ripping it off my back.”
Jett Lawrence: “My strategy of being all business, doesn’t include putting the holeshot device in.”
Triumph: “Supercross races are a bit more fun to take part in now.”
Beta: “Agreed.”
Main Image: Octopi Media
