The Curious Case for Benny Bloss

It’s an absolute TRAVESTY that Benny “Too Much Sauce” Bloss does not have a ride for the upcoming Lucas Oil Pro Motocross Championship. For those of you who do not know what travesty means, Google it or something. I’m not your freaking dictionary.

It is complete bullshit that no team is picking up what Benny and the Jets is putting down. You should be furious about this. Your mom should be pissed too. You should be yelling about it on your Twitters, Facebooks, and Instagrams.

I get why the Rocky Mountain ATV/MC KTM squad can’t house three riders. I’m not an idiot and I understand how teams work. BUT, you are telling me we cannot fit him SOMEWHERE with factory backing with some bonus incentives? Maybe throw an E-Z Up off the back of your giant ass rig?

Ben Dog deserves better than this. What did he do to all of you teams out there sleeping on him? Did he dunk on your girl? Did he put your cat in a tree? Did he cut down your beanstalk? 

You do realize that “Lip Bloss” literally makes all his big purse money from the Nationals, right? This is a guy who has raced 39 total Pro Motocross races to date, and he has finished inside the top ten in 22 of those races. IN THE 450 CLASS.

I may be off on one or two of those numbers because I counted fast, but you know what that means? It means that Benny is more solid than shit on a cold Winter’s morning. 

In fact, Bloss boss’ career best finish is a fourth overall at Unadilla in 2017 behind Roczen, Musquin, and Tomac. He was still trending up when a few injuries threw him off trajectory a bit. These things happen. It’s not Benny boy’s fault he is built like an NBA player AND can make a 450 look like a Supermini. 

You just wait. I have a really good source that I just made up telling me that Bloss “the Factories Loss” is going to go 1-1 at the opening round at Loretta Lynn Ranch. It is going to look like the 2015 Open Pro Sport class once again as he won that championship. He also won the Horizon Award that year, which means he is one of the greatest racers to ever live.

Bet.

Main image: Rocky Mountain ATV/MC KTM

Comments

  1. Hardcore agree with everything in this article. Big dude can ride and would be a rock solid number two guy on a factory team.

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Written by Troy Dog

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